Laughing stock...

Everybody knows that Fathers love inane humor - that's why they're called Dad Jokes.

In honor of Father's Day, stock up on a fresh batch of laughs to try out on your kids...

Dinner Jokes…

• What did the cake say to the gangster? “Ya wanna piece o’ me?”

• Why was the strawberry spread too thin? He got into a jam.

• What kind of berries are always sad? Blue berries.

• Where do lettuce, tomatoes and cucumbers go for fun? To a salad bar.

• Why did the crumb cake go to the doctor? It was feeling crummy.

• What did the corn say when it was complimented? Aw, shucks.

• Why did the tomato lose the race? He couldn’t ketchup.

• What kind of car is used to deliver eggs? A yolkswagen.

• What do sea monsters eat? Fish and ships.

Animal Tales…

• What did the shark say when he ate the clownfish? This tastes funny.

• What do elephants wear in the ocean? Their swimming trunks.

• What kind of maids clean the ocean? Mer-maids.

• Two fish were in a tank. One turned to the other and said: “How are we supposed to shoot this thing?”

• What do you call a group of singing bears? Bearitones.

• Why was the bear’s hair all sticky? He used a honey comb.

• Where do polar bears keep their money? In snowbanks.

• What do you call the rabbits that live at the North Pole? Cold.

• Why do cows wear bells? Because their horns aren’t loud enough.

• Why do cows have hooves and not feet. Because they lactose.

• What animal has the most lives? Frogs – they croak every day.

• What happens to frogs in no parking zones? They get toad away.

• Why do ducks make terrible doctors? They’re all quacks.

• Why don’t the animals trust the king of the jungle? They know he’s lion.

• What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe.

• Time flies like the wind. Fruit flies like the bananas.

Author Humor

• Why does Peter Pan fly so much? Because he Neverlands.

• What do you call “bears” without bees? “Ears.”

• What do you call seagulls that live in bays? Bagels

• What do you call a cowboy’s diary? A cattle-log.

• Where was Solomon’s temple? Beside his ear.

• How did the rabbit learn to fly? He made a hareplane.

• Did you read about the angry snowman? He had a meltdown.

• I don’t know why pirates are called pirates… They just ARRRR.

• How did the telemarketer propose to his girlfriend? He gave her a ring.

• An actor fell through the floorboards. He was just going through a stage!

• I read about a sailor who couldn’t remember the alphabet. He always got lost at “C”.

• What did they call the man who walked into the bar and ordered everyone a round? Bossy.

• What do rabbits read? Books with hoppy endings.

Happy Father's Day