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Wise Kids

Teaching Sunday School is an awesome source of grin-inducing anecdotes. These are some favorites.


A Sunday school teacher said to her children, "We have been learning how powerful kings and queens were in Bible times. But, there is an even higher power than a King or Queen. Can anybody tell me what it is?"

One child blurted out, "An Ace!"


A Sunday school teacher was doing her best to help her students relate to the story of Noah. Knowing that one boy in the class loved fishing, she asked, "Johnny, do you think Noah did a lot of fishing when he was on the Ark?"

"No," the boy replied. "How could he, with just two worms?"


The Sunday School teacher was describing how Lot's wife looked back and turned into a pillar of salt when little Jason interrupted, "My Mom looked back when she was driving," he announced triumphantly, "and she turned into a telephone pole!"


Nine-year-old Joey was asked by his mother what he had learned in Sunday school.

"Well, our teacher told us how God sent Moses behind enemy lines on a rescue mission to lead the Israelites out of Egypt. When he got to the Red Sea, he had his army build a pontoon bridge, and all the people walked across safely. Then, he radioed headquarters for reinforcements. They sent bombers to blow up the bridge and all the Israelites were saved."

"Now, Joey, is that really what your teacher taught you?" his mother asked.

"Well, no. But, if I told it the way the teacher did, you'd never believe it!"


The Sunday school teacher was carefully explaining the story of Elijah and the false prophets of Baal. She explained how Elijah built the altar, put wood upon it, cut the bull in pieces, and laid it on the altar. And then, Elijah commanded the people to fill four barrels of water and pour them over the altar. He had them do this four times.

"Now," said the teacher, "can anyone in the class tell me why the Lord would have Elijah pour water over the bull on the altar?"

A little girl in the back of the room started waving her hand, "I know! I know!" she said, "To make the gravy!"


The teacher was reminding her class of the Christmas story that they'd learned the week before.

"Does anyone remember the name of the angel who appeared to Mary?"

"I do! It was Harold," one boy shouted proudly. "Hark the Harold angel sings."


A Sunday school teacher was telling her class the story of the Good Samaritan, in which a man was beaten, robbed, and left for dead. She described the situation in vivid detail so her students would catch the drama. Then, she asked the class, "If you saw a person lying on the roadside, all wounded and bleeding, what would you do?"

A thoughtful little girl broke the hushed silence, "I think I'd throw up."


A Sunday School teacher had given her young class a month to memorize Psalm 23.

"Remember, next week you need to know The Lord is My Shepherd," she reminded them.

Little Rick was nervous about the task -- he just couldn't remember the Psalm. After much practice, he could barely get past the first line.

"Remember what your teacher said," his mom encouraged.

On the day that the kids were scheduled to recite Psalm 23 in front of the congregation, Rickey was the first to go. He stepped up to the microphone and said proudly, "The Lord is my Shepherd, and that's all I need to know."

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